Podcast Episode #602
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For Thom, it’s a present reality, for Sam it’s a prayer for the future. Listen as Thom and Sam discuss the attitudes each pray to avoid as senior adults in the church.
Highlights:
- Have an entitled attitude because of my giving to the church
- Say “I’ve done my time”
- Focus more on recreation than serving
- Complain
- Be more concerned about my preferences than the needs of others
- Lose my zeal for evangelism
Other highlights:
- As a senior adult with discretionary income, give joyfully with no strings attached.
- There is always a role for servants regardless of age.
- For a senior adult with health issues, the role of prayer warrior is one way to stay connected to the church body.
- Once you become preference driven, it is easier to become a complainer in the church.
Resources mentioned in today’s podcast:
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God save us from Grumpy Old Men and Women.
I’m now considered a Senior Adult and I refuse to become set in my ways Unless they point to Christ.
May I use some of your ideas in ministry, acknowledging the source.
Frederick –
We allow approvals for use one at a time rather than a blanket approval. Let us know the specific request for each use.
I pray I will never lose the desire to study and learn from the Bible and grow in grace and knowledge of Jesus Christ.
A pastor friend of mine offers this piece of advice to senior adults, “Make yourself useful!!” I don’t remember the title of an article but NAMB article I read encouraged senior adults to become involved in planting and pioneering new churches. It’s good advice too. The late Michael Green, when he was asked why he had chosen not to retire from active ministry, said, “I want to die with my boots on.” Jesus commissioned his disciples to go and make disciples. He said nothing about quitting at age 65 or age 72. While it may be true that some senior adults focus on recreation rather than serving, some churches encourage them to do that. I encountered ageism in a variety of forms in the church plant in which I was involved for about 10 years. While I still had a good singing voice and a ton of experience in singing in choirs and worship teams, none of that counted much because I did fit the youthful image that the church was trying to project at the time. I made myself useful, helping to set up and tear down for the worship gatherings and the children’s ministry and serving in the guest services/hospitality ministry. I also took an active part in the church’s small group ministry. When the church moved to a new and larger venue and made a number of changes in its ministry teams, I became involved in a preaching and worship ministry at a small declining church in a nearby community with the blessing of the church’s pastor. We both agreed that its members needed to hear God’s Word even if it was on its last legs. I am also a student at the local state university. This gives me an opportunity to meet young people and to minister to them in whatever way I can. I cannot imagine just warming a chair in a Sunday school class and pew in the sanctuary and playing pinochle with my friends as some senior adults do.
“I did NOT fit the youthful image that the church was trying to project at the time…” is what I meant to say. I was also turned down for the children’s church’s worship ministry because I could not dance and sing at the same time and did not know the words of “Jesus love me this I know,” a children’s song I had never learned. I knew beaucoup children’s songs but not that particular one. As turned out, several folks who passed the audition couldn’t sing and dance at the same time either. However, they were younger than I was.
I’m sorry, but this whole article smacks of ageism.
How many times are younger believers told they are preference driven when they refuse to attend a church that does not do contemporary concert worship, or does not provide separate services for children and teens, or that focuses on Christ rather than felt needs?
How often are younger adults chided for not giving robustly unless the church is allowing them to lead, or making the services revolve around their preferences, or accused of refusing to serve because job/child rearing/schooling is taking up their spare time?
How often are younger adults accused of being grumpy when they complain older leadership will not get out of the way and let them lead?
The attitudes referenced are certainly not good ones, and no Christian should indulge in them. BUT they are no more likely among the older adults than among the younger ones.
Something I recently overheard: at church they want the senior adults to pay up, clean up, and shut up. They want the younger adults to be front and center, the church to be driven by their preferences, and the older adults to foot the bill both financially and physically.
The reply was even more chilling: leadership has spent 40 years conditioning us to be consumer focused. Why are they surprised when like good consumers we go elsewhere when we dislike the product offered?
The truth is, in the USA at least, we are a rapidly graying nation. Rather than youth focused as the future of the church, we better figure out how to minister to the older folks or plan on closing the doors.
Or wait–better yet, we could focus on getting the gospel out instead of age baiting, race baiting, gender baiting, or any other in fighting.
I will now crawl back under my rock of cantankerousness. Well, no, not really. I will continue joyfully serving my Lord at church, in my everyday life, and endeavoring to populate heaven.
Good post re attitudes, but ageist!
As a pastor of 23 years it may be ageism but it is by and large very true. In my setting, the seniors seem more entitled than my millennials. Churches usually die because of bad theology, being socially justified before Christ first- and finally an unwillingness to adapt and change.
I think the pay up, clean up, and shut up with regard to senior adults is really real.
I am a musician.
I attend a contemporary service at our church.
I can play anything musically I have seen them play and can play as well as as their best ones and better than most.
However, do they want a grey- headed old man on the platform who can still “rock out” with the best of them? No. Absolutely not.
Sad to say — seems like one has to be young to do anything; we older ones are there just to pay the bills.
Never thought after 50 years in the ministry being “put out to pasture” would be this cold.
YES! Thank you Cotton! I have also experienced exactly what you described.
I won’t say more because even after a decade it still hurts very deeply.
I am a senior citizen and our culture does confirm that fact based on my age (80 Years). Sometimes I am referred to as a radical which does not offend me; after all there are radicals in the Bible who I highly respect and love. I have not retired from the workplace, although my pace naturally is somewhat slower. I have also not retired from ministry. The joy of applying my energies to glorify God in my secular job and encouraging other Christians in the workplace to evangelize lifts my spirit daily. In addition there are several opportunities daily to share love and to exhibit and to show others your caring attitude. Younger church members and Christians need care and they need to be mentored so they can assume leadership positions and fulfill their spiritual gifts. Criticism, judgement and poor attitude does nothing but harm the outreach spirit of the church. So Dr. Rainer, I too hope and pray that you avoid copying the attitude of so many of our senior citizens. God has created us for a purpose throughout our entire earthly life and as one of His children, created in His image, we don’t escape that purpose until we enter eternity with Him.
May your number increase, Sam!
I would add one more VERY important thing to the list of six, making it seven:
7. Don’t relish in the glory day’s of the past!
It is so frustrating to hear previous leaders, elders, and senior members (I’m 56, so I’m no baby) talk about what worked 30, 40 or 50 years ago. Young adults, young families and those in their 30’s don’t relate to bus ministries, film-strips, and tent meetings… just to name a few. We need to deal with what is happening today as well as plan for the future. Sure, we can definitely learn from the past and there is wisdom in the principles that can be extracted from some of those successful but historical church activities and events. We can also enjoy the memories. We should not, however, try to copy and implement things that will not work or that we do not have the resources for (especially in small, shrinking churches like ours!)
It seems churches often want to hire a “younger” pastor, not because they think he can necessarily relate to younger people (leaving the older people in the cold) ; they just want an inexperienced pastor to boss around, onewho doesn’t know better than to ally with the power mongers in the church who use the word Jesus for another ally for control.
While there isn’t a “mandatory retirement” age in SBC churches, it is all to obvious there is one; one very rarely moves to an advanced ministry after age 55.
However, to the contrary, in so many of the denominational churches where pastors are “appointed,” the older pastors are almost always the ones in the larger, highly-respected churches.
There appears to be a disrespect for aging in SBC churches that our sister churches of other denominations seem to uphold.
This is not just true with pastors; it seems the same with music leaders.